There are two things in women’s lives that consume, motivate, and at times devastate us: dieting and dating.
I myself have been up, down, and in between on both subjects. Luckily the diet thing came faster than the dating thing; but as always, it’s a work in progress.
I’ve blogged before about how much relationships and fitness coincide with one another. Whether you’re single, dating, married, divorced, I see on a day to day basis how relationships affect and change women’s fitness goals. Which is why I’m going to stand my ground on this next statement; “If women treated their diets like their relationships, we would all be walking around with six-packs and skinny jeans on.”
Think about it.
We max credit cards, move to other sides of the country, and switch careers; all for relationships? Why can’t we dedicate the same motivation towards our fitness goals?
Well, it’s not easy to determine the answer to that question, but it is pretty simple to determine the similarities of dating and diets.
The 6 stages of dating your diet:
-The first date. Whether you met online (hey, I don’t judge) or through a friend; either way something about this guy roped you in enough to brush your hair, wear your fancy heels, and attempt at an hour of conversation with a stranger; the same goes with your diet. Paleo, gluten-free, south beach; something about this diet or lifestyle appealed to you, otherwise you wouldn’t be entertaining the idea. Here’s where we go right and wrong:
We approach our first date with guys with optimism and the approach of having an open mind, very similar to researching your new diet make over. “He might be the one is the exact same as saying, “This might be what finally gets me results.”
So whether you sat through mediocre sushi and “I went to Penn State” banter; you know, that very second whether or not there will be a second date. So how should our first date go with our diets? Exactly the same.
Approach with optimism and an open mind; but just because everything wasn’t exactly how we imagined, shouldn’t mean we black book our diet. Give it a second date; it might be the one.
-The honeymoon stage. He loves your dog and went to yoga with you; he’s your dream guy. You love, love, love everything about him and don’t really mind the pet peeves, because you’re happy and have a plus one to your friend’s wedding; life is awesome!
How’s the honeymoon stage of your diet? Awesome!
You’re seeing results, it’s working with your lifestyle, and you are 2 pds. Away from dominating those cut off shorts!
I give the same advice for both subjects; enjoy this part! Be happy that you found something that works for you and makes sense to your life, just be careful not to get caught up. Everything is puppies and unicorns in the honeymoon stage. Remember, some maintenance work might be soon to follow.
-The norm. Remember how cute his laugh was and now it reminds you of a seal in labor? Or how you didn’t mind at all eating chicken and broccoli in the beginning; but now you’d punch a baby in the face for a cupcake? Welcome to the norm; where reality rules, and longevity is the fight. The norm of a relationship is the make or break for anyone; whether it’s a dude or carbs. This is when you find out if the FUNDAMENTALS of this partnership work for you.
Was the diet too restricted for your taste or schedule? Was the relationship based on late night vodka fueled passion? (hey girl, hey)
The norm is where you have to decide if this is really what you want; and do it fast. Two things will happen if you don’t: you fall off the wagon or fall out of love.
Work, balance, and continuing to adjust is what gets you through the norm and makes it not just a relationship with him or your diet; it’s now YOUR lifestyle.
-The proposal. He bought the freaking cow! And your new marriage to your diet is that cheese! Basically, this stage is acceptance, tolerance, and commitment to what you know in your heart works for you. It’s not always the easiest, but it’s what makes you feel comfort and stability. This is your go-to diet, down to the prepping, the workouts; the results. Good for your sister for putting a ring on it! I pray your relationships and healthy lifestyle stories end and stay here. Some do, some don’t…..which brings me to the next phase of your diet’s relationship status.
-The seven-year itch. Well you committed, and it was worth it, but now you find yourself maybe wanting more results? Or the same thing doesn’t seem to be doing the trick anymore? Hey, a lifetime of brown M&M’s; sometimes a gal just wants a green one! The answer is yes, you can totally stray from your normal diet; not your man lol.
Part of keeping ahead of your body and keeping results is not being afraid to be pushed out of your comfort zone. Try something new; mix it with the old, just keep experimenting! Forward progress is always changing and your diet isn’t any different.
Keep in mind that what has always worked for you has merit too it; in diets and relationships. Besides, brown M&M’s are the best tasting in the long run.
-Not always the case, but sometimes; the divorce. This is a rough time; for whatever the break up is. Whether you left him or vegetarianism; breaking up is hard to do, so I’ll keep this to the point.
The second you are un-happy with how your diet is making you feel, look, or act; it’s over, that goes for relationships too. You cannot force yourself to fit into a lifestyle that doesn’t make you happy, and you can only go on so long pretending that it was right for you. Here’s what you do when you know you and your diet need to get the big “D”.
Do it, don’t feel guilty about it, and move the hell on.
-The newfound love. So you tried, failed, succeeded, and learned a few things. By this time in you and your diet’s relationship you know what you want (your goals) and you know what you have to offer (your motivation and lifestyle); so make it work! (sorry Project Runway Plug; Tim Gunn knows what’s up!)
Look at it this way; the newfound love for a man or a diet has two parts to it; NEW-FOUND.
Breaking it down for you; it’s new because you’ve tried the rest and you ended up here. It’s found because you’ve done the leg work, logged the man hours (literally), and know what’s right for you.
It would be nice if we could just update our diet status on facebook for the whole world to see; but we’re women, we’re too smart for that.
Part of having a successful relationship with your body, your goals, and your balance is remembering that break ups happen, first dates can surprise us, and at the end of the day it’s ok to be a hopeless romantic because when you love your body and yourself; there’s no status update required.
Work.Hard. Lift.Heavy Live.Blessed